Happy

When you learn to be content with the small things, it's hard to look at bigger things with the same sense of awe and appreciation. Largely, I've reached a stage where I'm happy with just about everything. Going out with friends, jogging, walking around with no purpose, receiving messages from people you care about, and stuff...they never fail to put a smile upon my face.

So when bigger things come along, how does one which is so easily satisfied supposed to react? It's hard to be MORE satisfied, so then comes along the problem of...if I'm going to get equal satisfaction from both things, then why bother with something which simply gives more trouble? I'm not really sure what point I'm trying to get to, but my birthday's here, and I don't really know how to feel. I guess I haven't been able to think about it so much, because there's so many things going on with my life...so much that it doesn't seem that significant anymore.

But still, people choose to make a big deal about it, and at the back of my mind, there's a voice saying that it should be a big deal, but now that I think about it, should it be...really?

I'm happy, don't doubt that please, but at the same time, my mind is filled with noise, my heart with unease, and discomfort. Nothing is certain, and as time passes, everything is changing. I've passed out from BMT, I've received my A-level results, and I'm about to apply for university. At the same time, I feel a longing for a certain void in my life to be filled.

Life's not perfect, but I'll still live it, and I'll face it with a smile.