The Puzzle is Puzzling, Guzzling, Nuzzling

I don't know why so many months on, I still can't get some things out of my mind. Try as I might, they cling on; I struggled, trying to push the feelings to the deepest depths of corners of corners in my mind but that failed to work. I embraced it, but again, the consequences had me reveling in nothing but pain, and misery, and all the other thorns that comes with the general state of depression.

And now I'm here. And if asked where exactly is here, and the answer will be "the state of mind" I was back in the beginning of the year. I guess I'm still longing for that special state of happiness, which seems so unattainable with anybody else.

Anyway. I think I laugh an awful lot in school. And then I go back home to type this. Which begs the question of "Why?" Is it some weird facade I put up in school, to protect myself from pity, and what-not? Or do I put on a certain persona here, to garner the pity that I so wish to exclude from myself?

It's all so...ahh...interesting.

But without a doubt, I'm having a blast in ACJC. The laughter's real, and the camaraderies (however you spell that) is there, and what I feel, and what I am is who I think I am, which is still very confusing. So yeah, just food for thought as to what I'm thinking.

Dropped by Eileen's house just now. Seeing how I ended school super early on Mondays (I love Mondays. And Wednesdays. They're so full of win), I decided to visit my dear friend who sprained her ankle (again!), and stubbed her toe (again!), and who's confined to her house (again!) for the umpteenth time this year.



PS: I was forced to do this -_-".
PSS: I have proof.
PSSS: Here it is

Je pense, donc je suis. says:
mus blog abt me!

Shall leave you guys with this picture. Yay rose-amongst-the-thorns! Can you spot the chick in this bevy of "hawtness"? Answer's below. In white.





2nd row from the bottom. Middle. She's so kawaii!

In the future, your reputation on the internet will be all that matters.

I'm just dropping in to say 'hi'.

The last week really drained the hell out of me. Physically, I had little sleep; homework came in buckets of shmuck; getting through 'em was hard work, especially maths, which to this evening, has proven to be a waking nightmare. Integration's really difficult, especially when one sum takes up to a page, and ten minutes (coffee is optional, pulling out of hair, however, is not), to get through, and you've got 20-over questions of that, multiplied by three because of three tutorials, and you got a brain filled with dead gray matter.

Monday was quite slack, I think.

We had our first PR meeting on Tuesday, and I did the minutes, which took up more minutes than it should have. The meeting itself was fun! We're the PRofessional PRagmatic PRacticioners of PRotection of PRanking PRetties in PRague, or any other thing which might start with PR (Except for PRomiscuous, or PRostitute, because that would PRobably be PRoblematic). And I'm doing Publicity and Feedback with Eng, so yeap. My place is cemented up there.

And zomg the emotionally draining experience of Wednesday. Haha. Lots of uncalled-for depression, on Wednesday, and the following two days too. Thanks for the care and concern you gave me guys, HanLin, ZhuYing, Jolene, and everybody else. And thank you too, for you know, for knowing that this sentence is referring to you, and for knowing how much some things mean to me.

And then there was Physics Independent learning. I should have started on it earlier, but I've discovered my working style. I stayed up until 2 in the morning just adding finishing touches, random facts, footnotes and the works.

I work best at the last minute, and produce work of high quality too. The less time I've left, the better, and faster the work I produce. Not that I've done work at the NON-last minute, of course. I've got to give it a shot some time. I'm so loving proud of my Independent Learning module...seriously..."Hydrodynamica; A look at Bernoulli's Principle", what an awesome title. I don't care that I over-shot the word limit :(. Props to Phoung and TianGe for they're work, too.

Saturday itself was a energy sucking Zubat (Pokemon wtf?), it was like walking around with a lynch seed stuck up my nose, or something. Dropped by Queenstown to watch the latest work, and I'm quite happy with what I saw. Love the singing. Talked to Ms Khoo to get some of the latest going-ons of the school, and walked around to drown in nostalgia. Ahh...good old Secondary School days :).

I then headed over to King Albert Park, reaching at 11, for a meeting with the class which was at 12:30, where people only arrived close to 1. Played cards at the Macs, but got told off. Dang. As it is, I can't play cards in school, and now, I can't even play it at Macs. We weren't even gambling *grumblegrumble*, and I don't look rich enough to be gambling *grumblegrumblemumble*. And we were having so much fun too...

Left for Melrose Children's Home near Ngee Ann, and did CIP. It was originally gardening that we were supposed to do, but we ended up organizing the library. Which is harder than it seems. We found many books, ranging from the fun, to the funnily weird, in the "What's-this-doing-here" kinda way.

There was Pokemon! And Simpsons comics! And those Mr-something books too. The author of that book is really cruel. Why would a character called "Mr Bump", who bumps into things, ever be created? He "bumps" into everything, be it street-lamp, to buildings and stuff. As someone who's bumped into way too many things before (hence, my growing retarded-ness -_-"), I mean it when I say "bumping" hurts.

Lotsa laughing. And dust. And juggling!

Went for dinner at Bukit Timah Someplace for stingray and food, to talk about...GIRLS...and LIFE. Jon said they didn't click, but I find that those two subjects are tangled up in some screwed-up way. That's my take it on anyway. Hopped on 67, which passed by Little India, where I fell asleep, and when I opened my eyes, I was in CHANGI.

Dang Changi. Who the heck lives there anyway? Ended up taking a cab home.

And sleeping at 10.

To waking up at 8 on Sunday.

And sleeping again at 10.

And waking up at 2.

Half my day's gone to recuperation, and I had to catch up on slacking too, which is more productive that it seems. Caught Hana Kimi! Squee <3.

So yeap. That's me. I think I'll do weekly digests. It's easier to eat. I mean read.

Suspending this for abit.

I'm
I won't be around for awhile, and I do mean awhile. I'm struggling to find the time to make quality posts, so yeah, that saddens me, but I guess I've got things to do now. Lots of things. I'm getting really involved in AC, so yeah.

My Dream:
-Contribute to AC so much that they change the name to Angelo-Chinese.
-Open up a branch in Philippines and christen it as Angelo-Filipino Junior College.

I'm in the midst of writing our "Council Men" cheer/song. See it here, first. Soon.

And as for the above picture...I'm actually looking for the handicap toilet. Because I'm lame.

Geddit?

More than metal.

Soar On Eagle's Wings

Finally, the worse-er part of the week is over! OVER!

Let's see the past few days, and marvel at the lack of breathing space I had; It all went by like "whoosh", damnit.

Saturday- Invest Rehearsal! From morning, all the way until late at night, because of souvenir making. Reached home way past curfew.
Sunday- Souvenir making at Joce's house. From morning, until late at night, AGAIN. Reached home way past curfew.
Monday-Investiture! I'm trying to collate the pictures; rest assured that once they're up, you'll see them here. Ended the day quite early, but I went shopping for gifts with Soe Min, Joce and PJ at Suntec. Reached way past curfew, but I wormed my way out of this one.
Tuesday-Went home early-ish, but not before dropping by Ikea to settle some souvenir stuff, this time Line-in Related. Finished my EOM at this point, at blazing fast speed, too.
Today- Banner tying in the morning was a blast! Could have used with more planning, but tying banners in the rain was TIGHT. Had Line-in dinner too, which was enjoyably fun :).

Situation: Me and Soe Min found each other on the Interchange at Chou Chu Kang, and got on the bus.

Soe Min: For all you know, we could be like, lost. In the middle of nowhere. We might even have passed the stadium.
Raymond: Good point. Uncle, where's the stadium?
Uncle: Here.
Raymond and Soe Min: *pushes their way out of the bus*.



Edited with a capital "M".

I'm here!

And I'm here! And I haven't gone anywhere? So why?

Anyways! I was playing Pokemon on the bus the other day, on my way home from another exhausting investiture rehearsal (it's this Monday! Goodbye LBB, or should I say LBM for Luminous Badge MEN), and I read something interesting in the Canclave Library:

The Original Story

In the beginning, there was only a churning turmoil of chaos. At the heart of the chaos, where all things became one, appeared an egg. Having tumbled from the vortex, the Egg gave rise to the Original One.

From itself, two beings the Original One did make. Time started to spin. Space began to expand.

From itself again, three living things the Original One did make.

The two beings wished, and from them, matter came to be. The three livings things wished, and from them, spirit came to be. The world, created, the Original One took to unyielding sleep...

Wow. Fascinating, isn't it? The Pokemon world was created by a Pokemon GOD. Kinda cool, how this game, which is clearly arousing paganism and shyte, are being played by young children all over the world, who are totally oblivious to the influence. Or maybe I'm only thinking this because I'm mature enough to be aware. What the hat lah, but I can imagine someone in the Pokemon world worshiping a statue of a Pokemon...and then a mob will come with fire and brimstone.

"Burn that witch,"

So anyways, if you think this was weird, you should play further into the game. Team Galaxy, the latest reincarnation of organized villains, have realized that our Earth is DYING, and we're running low on energy. They realised that when Pokemons evolve, life is basically generated. At first they experimented on different Pokemons (check the evolved form of Tangela, Lickuting, etc), but the experimentations only granted limited results. And so, it plans to reawaken the God pokemon (He's called Arceus btw), to generate more evolutions, and harness that energy to SAVE THE WORLD.

My mind just got blown.

Appreciation isn't the "in" thing, apparently

Got this picture from TuanJiaw's blog! My gay buddy, Jiahan, ChooChi, Karwai, Bob (they're all his names) got head-hunted by the "U" magazine, or something like that. Dang freak! Congrats Jiahan, ChooChi, Karwai, Bob. But srsly...those shorts...WTF? And I would love to see that jacket in all it's mat-tish glory.

The terms are over and done with! Let's do a wrap-up!

GP: A! 37/50!
This was a real miracle for me. I got 24.5 and 23.5 for my previous two tests; to have shot up 10 marks makes me feel all good and weak inside. I got 8.5 (out of 8) for summary, and 6 for AQ, which is a B+. Yay for GP. Now...let's get past the 30 mark barrier for essay and I'll be set for life.

Geography: A! 41/50!
Lucky again, I feel. I simply looked out for which chapters I felt had the highest probability of coming out, and it did! Whoever said diagrams were necessary lied, because mine had none. I had more confidence with my human geog, but as I've said, the definition of "transnational" hurt me bad, I think.

Malay B: B! 60++
:D:D:D:D:D:D:D. And the top scorer in AC for Malay B is....RAYMOND ANGELO! Yays.

Econs: C. 25/45.
I don't know what happened to my Data-response question, which was about gaming, and the current console war. I guess I got too wrapped in with what I've read from the net, and I hardly used any economic concept. Essay was OK only; still no sight of the answer sheet, so I don't know where I went wrong. I basically threw everything in, hoped for the best, and...sigh. I'll do better next time.

Physics: C. 39/70.
Could have gotten a B for this one. I was careless too many times; got hurt very badly by 'em. I still believe I should have gotten some marks, but my teacher refuses to budge whenever I talk to him. Maybe I should try more genteel tactics...hmm...

Maths: U.
Got this trick from HanLin, I think. Whenever someone asks me how much I scored for Maths, I'll say "U", but I'll pronounce it as if it was "You?", and throw a quizzical look with the question.

Yeap. This weekend! Investiture rehearsal today! Finish up PW EOM! Do Physics homework! Revise Maths! Get started on Econs essay! Get big-ass pencils! Plan that dinner!

"M" is for Men.

Situation; Me, Jolene and Becca went down to the gym to buy shorts.

Raymond: Uncle, can I have MEN'S shorts?
Bewildered Uncle: What?
Raymond: MEN'S SHORTS.
Bewildered Uncle: Orh! What size?
Raymond: Size M.
Bewildered Uncle: Okie.
Raymond: "M" for "MEN".

Becca's at the background giving me the weirdest look ever, and Jo remains unaccounted for.

Raymond Angelo- 100% MEN.

No Failure, Only Feedback

C for Physics.
C for Econs.
A for GP.

And I didn't sit for any Maths paper. I still don't recall sitting in the middle of the badminton hall, with a pen filled with ink, and a brain which couldn't think. I had plenty of time to come up with rhymes; leaving questions blank, under the tables I try to wank.

Wait, what?

Anyways, Maths was horrible horrible paper, and I seriously need to relook at how I've been practicing them TYS. I even got the Red Spot equivalent, and yet, I did so badly.

Oh! And I'm president of Line-in. That's one of the primary reasons I've been so busy. Council, PW, and trying to mug.

Hiya SzeChing

Right-click from here, and then save-as.

Notes on a Break-up

So things seemed so solid (or is it really), you're in 7th Heaven, on cloud 9 living life as it's meant to be. And then it falls apart so horribly, and you're left hurt, because you're bound to break some bones when you fall from such great heights.

The thing about a break-up is that something is broken. That's what the word "break" is for, see? Now, this is a good sign. Because it indicates that something isn't working. Most of the time, the couple's able to fix them chinks; as a matter of fact, a relationship is filled with many mini-break-ups. A break-up "BREAK-UP" is something which takes a longer time to fix.

Of course, there's the possibility that it won't get fixed, but that's what belief is for :).

So anyways, that justifies the use of "break". But why break-up, and not break-down?

Because things will only go on the ascent from here. The journey starts at the pits, but from here on out, it's all up up up.

Man and Thinking

What? Men think about sex?

Yes, they do think about sex. Shocking as it might be to believe, but it's one of the primary instincts of us humans.

What men? Think about sex?

There are men around, and hence, there are thoughts about sex.

What? Men think? About sex.

Yes, men do think. About nothing much; Primarily sex. Mostly sex. Only sex. Even an innocent thought like doing maths can be connected to doing "it". Let's say I score well for maths, I'll impress my galfwenz, and maybe they'll go out with me, and one thing will lead to another, ketchup will spill on shirts..."My shirt is dirty...maybe I should..."

*SNIP!*

What men think about sex?

I'll leave this unanswered.

Alive with the Glory of Love

By Say Anything

Ahhhh Ahhhh Ahhhh ahhhh...
When i watch you, wanna do you, right where you're standing, ya...
Right on the foyer, on this dark day, right in plain view...OH ya...
Of the whole ghetto, the boot-stomped meadows, but we ignore that..ya..
You're lovely baby, this war is crazy, i won't let you down, OH NO..noo
No, I wont let them take you, wont let them take you,
Hell no no, oh no, i wont let them take you, wont let them take you,
Hell no no
no
oh no no no

And when our city, vast and shitty, falls to the axis, ya...
They'll search our buildings, collect gold fillings, wallets, and rings..Oh ya..
But Miss Black Eyeliner, You'd look finer, with each day in hiding, oh ya..
Beneath the wormwood, oooh love me so good, they won't hear us screw away the day
I'll make you say noo I won't let them take you, won't let them take you
(Alive, Alive, Alive with glory alive with glory)
Hell no no, whoa no, i wont let them take you, wont let them take you, hell no no

Now Treblinka is alive with the glory of love
Treblinka  alive with glory of love yea

(Okay, speed it up now)

Should they catch us, and dispatch us to those separate work camps
I'll dream about you, I will not doubt you with the passing of time, oh ya..
Should they kill me, your love will fill me as warm as the bullets, ya..
I'll know my purpose, this war was worth it, i won't let you down
no i wont no i wont no i wont (alive) (alive with love, alive with love)
Hell no no, whoa no, i wont let them take you, wont let them take you
Hell no no....no, no,

Gar

I received a question regarding my new blog name. What IS "GARR"?

Go grit your teeth, and build it up at your diaphragm, and let out a low "gar". Feels good, no? Now do it again, only harder, with more volume, and more intensity. "GAR!" It's building up...Take a deep breath, and then...

"GARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!"

That feeling that it evokes in you? That's GAR. It's an onomatopoeia. I think.

Games to play with Raymond Angelo!

Post got deleted. Not enough time to re-do, so I'll give you a thousand words instead.



God, this is like the combination of my current loves. Ok, so maybe it's missing a few, but I read "House of M" and I loved it, and I watched Transformers and I loved it, and this image makes me feel so warm and fuzzy inside.

The Sad Life of Cubone :(

I'm sure everyone loves Pokemon. They're all so cute and cuddly, so how can you not love them? Recently, I've been playing Pokemon Diamond (:\), and a certain skull-wearing Pokemon caught my eye; the almighty Cubone.

This is a DINOSAUR Pokemon, who wears a m-f'ing skull on it's head, and uses someone's RIBS as a CLUB! Dang, that's awesome; on top of that, it's got it's own trade-mark move, which is the legendary Bonemerang. Kick ass. With my curiosity adequately aroused, I went to check out his Pokedex entry, and it made me :(. Seriously...:(((((((((((((((!!!!!

He's called the Lonely Pokemon. He has an attack called "Look for Friends". And his hp is only 50! He can't even withstand a single Bubblebeam...



Here are the entries from each version. They're dang depressing.

Red/Blue: Because it never removes its skull helmet, no one has ever seen this Pokémon's real face.
Yellow: Wears the skull of its deceased mother. Its cries echo inside the skull and come out as a sad melody.
Gold: If it is sad or lonely, the skull it wears shakes, and emits a plaintive and mournful sound.
Silver: It always wears the skull of its dead mother, so no one has any idea what its hidden face looks like.
Crystal: It lost its mother after its birth. It wears its mother's skull, never revealing its true face.

So basically, its mother dies in child-birth...and then it takes its mother's skulls and wears it for himself for the rest of his life. It tries to move on from the death, but because of the skull he wears, he is constantly reminded of his painful past, and the death which followed his birth :(. The lines on the skull are lines made by constant tears running down his face...

Don't mess with Pokemans man, there's more to them than meets the eye. Raymond Angelo, reporting Pokeman oddities, one pokemon at a time. 1 down, 493 (!) to go.

The Money Dilemna

Yay! The physics spa went by without much incident. My graph was good, as in, there was no anomalies, and I think I wrote everything I was supposed to write. The time-keeper told us the wrong timings though; I was under the impression that I had 15 minutes left, so slowly and steadily, I was making my table neater, and then *bam* 6 minutes deducted just like that, and I'm rushing through every-single dang detail.

Oh well. And I totally had no idea how the hat I was supposed to mark the pendulum bob on the piece of paper. And the lab attendants were standing just behind me (I was right at the back, see), so it felt like they were scrutinizing every single thing I was doing. The feeling of a 40-year-old auntie knowing more than you in physics sucks (No agism, or sexism there, I'm just... :( )

Went with Hanlin, Jon, Becca, Jolene and Moses to wherever for lunch. We still weren't sure where we were going to eat, and we were already at City Hall. There were so many suggestions, but they were deflected by Hanlin, the devourer-of-everything (he RECENTLY ate at every single restaurant we could think of), and by Jolene and Jon the picky eaters :(. "Pepper Lunch" it was lah, so yeah.

Initially, I had my eyes set on the meals 1-4, because it had rice. And then I realised (like whoa) you could add rice to the other meals as well! It blew my mind man, seriously, because it opened this gate of possibility to me. Moral of the day? Don't be stupid.

Went to Orchard Library because the ZhongGouRen (I totally butchered that phrase, but it means Rice-planters in mandarin, I think) had their Chinese project to do. As for me? I read comics. Comics kick-ass. I finished JLA's "A League of One", X-men: New Mutants "Choosing Sides", and brought Thor; Disassembled and House of M back home.

I'll flip anyone who says comics are childish off :(.

I left early, to get some shut-eye (3 hours, yeah!), but not before walking around aimlessly for abit. I wanted to buy something, and it came down to this: the Transformers Official Guidebook, Optimus Prime, A Theory of Nearly Everything (on the String theory), or Double Fault. Then through the process of rational elimination, I eliminated everything. Boo.

1) Official Guidebook- There's the internet.
2) Optimus Prime- $99. But I swear, eventually...
3) A Theory Of Nearly Everything- It's a Physics book; I thought it'll be like those "for dummies kind", but I flipped through and got a head-ache, so no.
4) Double Fault- Honestly, I don't know why I didn't buy this, and I'm smacking myself right now, in the head, with brute force.

So yeah, sad.

School's back to normal tomorrow, and yeah...all the best to those who are getting back their results!

garGarGArGARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!

Eventful day yesterday lah; lots of stuff happened, and I was uber-pooped when I got home, but I managed to wake up at 6-ish, got some mileage in, and watched some anime too.

Run-down!
-Lots of slacking in the morning.
-Did some muscle exercises.
-Headed down to Marg's house, to do folding of papers into straws and all that.
-Got lost in Clementi! With no wallet (ie, no money) what's a Raymond Angelo, materialistic himbo to do? Asked for directions lor, but not before making futile attempts to find the correct bus stop.
-Sorta heart-to-heart with Darren Tan. Thanks for coming down man.
-The BBQ. Thanks to all the people who organised it! It was really long, and lotsa stuff happened along the way, but yeah, it was fun.
-Going home :).

Collapsed on the bed. Like ker-plunk.

AND GARRRR!! Will do a review of Transformers later. The most GARRR movie of the year. Or should I say...the most CARRRR?!?!